"9 Months..."

I've been dating the same great woman for the last nine or so months (the longest relationship I've ever been in), without a single argument, nonsensical disagreement or accusation of "Looking at another person". Kristi, my girlfriend, is the most stable woman I've ever dated, and when I say stable I mean that she doesn't act childish or spiteful, doesn't have temper tantrums or hurl invectives like an Underground Battle Emcee. If anything, despite the fact that I'm 5 years older than her, she's far more mature than I am... and I find that disturbing, not that she's mature, but that I'm not. Hmmm... ah, well... no one's perfect.

Every month she has to remind me of how long we've been together, and not because she likes to nit-pick, but since I have trouble remembering my own family's birthdays, let alone something like that. My mind is a treasure trove of useless shit, folks... no kidding. For instance, I know that in issue #42 of the original X-Men comic book series (because Marvel cancelled it until "Giant-Sized X-Men #1" was released with the new, international X-Men) that The Changeling was assassinated while impersonating Professor X, who was away at another location, attempting to stop an alien invasion... but I can't remember my biological Father's birthday, and I end up having to ask my Mom what the birthday of the man that she divorced nearly thirty years ago is.

And that's just fucking sad...

I haven't been in a relationship where we didn't have to do anything to hang out, but in this one with Kristi, I don't have to worry about it... at all... EVER. And on top of that, she's one of the most giving and caring individuals that I've ever known, do you know how cool that is? And here is a sample of our conversations on the phone:

Kristi: "Hey sweety, what're you up to?"

Todd: "Nothing, just watching Law & Order: Criminal Intent. How was your day?"

Kristi: "Oh, it was good... me and Trish are going over to her parents for Dinner, what are you doing tonight?"

Todd: "Probably just working on my comic book... do you want to have Dinner later on in the week?"

Kristi: "We'll see... if not, we can always do something this weekend. Well, I gotta go... I Love You."

Todd: "I Love You , too... drive safe tonight, and I'll call you tomorrow."

Kristi: "Okay... talk to you tomorrow. 'Night"

Todd: "'Night, Honey..."

And that's it! Do you understand how nice it is to not have to spend one or more hours on the phone, talking about every nuance of my day?! I've had so many girlfriends that I had to spend hours talking to on the phone... about nothing! Nothing at all! And to many people, this is considered completely healthy and normal!

Not me... but then again, I'm an artist and a comic, so I guess I like my solitude every once and a while. It helps me to clear my thoughts.

You know, this is the first girlfriend that I haven't had my pre-made "Exit Strategy" handy at all times, and I know that everyone else knows what I mean by that. That means that she is a part of my daily schedule, and I love her family... I've sewn myself into her life, and she's done the same to mine... and I'm not uncomfortable by that... at all. Many of my friends are already married, and I've never given a girl a ring... not even a decorative ring.

I grew up in a "Marriage is about as 'sacred' a vow as it has to be" kind of up-bringing... my Mom got sick of dealing with my Father after 5 years (a long time to be miserable), and my first Step-Dad after 11 years (a really long time to be miserable)... so my view of marriage is one of practicality: As long as it works, you're cool, but sometimes it just won't work, so you have to move on. And I guess that kind of thinking has been kind of a shield against going any further in my relationships with the women that I've been with, but it was always self-imposed... my parents had nothing to do with it.

And to be quite honest, half of the girls that I dated? Bbbrrrrr... I think that they can be best described as "Somewhere between Ann Coulter and The Great Horned One from the eighth Ring of the Inferno"... no shit. I've dated some women that were so twisted that I feared sleeping next to them without a Cross, Vial of Holy Water and a necklace of Garlic... you know, for protection. And I'm not even Christian!

Bottom line, Kristi is one of the coolest friends that I've ever had, besides just being my girl-friend. I've heard many people say that you have to be friends in order for the relationship to work, and I always thought that they were reeking of feces... until I met Kristi.

So here's to you, Hon!