"Elderly Authorities"

Why do people (especially old people) say, “I’m going to alert the proper authorities” when something happens near their house? What is a proper authority, the cops? So would improper authorities be the EPA, the CDC or PETA? I imagine the phone call would go something like this, “Yes, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals? I have a problem here.” “Go ahead ma’am, I’m listening.” “Well, we have a couple of kids outside loitering on the sidewalk.”
The PETA representative is silent for a couple of seconds, and then asks “So you have a group of young goats on the sidewalk? We’ll alert the local Animal Control office to go pick them up.” The old lady responds, “No, they aren’t goats, they’re kids… you know, children.” The Rep sighs audibly and replies, “Lady, what the hell is wrong with you? Call the cops, not us… we deal with ethical breaches concerning animals, not children.” The senior citizen pauses and then says, “What if two of them are pooping on the front lawn like dogs, does that count?” “No, ma’am, that doesn’t count.” “Okay, so since the kids aren’t animals, what’s the ethical response to me rubbing their noses in it?”